Wednesday, July 23, 2014

True Mommy Friends

I have never been great at making friends.  Don't get me wrong once I have friends I tend to cling to them like saran wrap for life.  I am pretty sure a certain friend of mine probably thinks I am downright needy at the moment.  Mr. Destructo has switched his work shift to second shift.  Which means I am alone with both kiddos from 4 until 12 every night during the week.  Which means I have to handle dinner, bath time, bedtime all by myself.  ALONE.  This in turn is slowly making me insane.  Which results in phone calls to my bestie nearly every night.  And lots and I do mean LOTS of whining.  Yeah I am talking about you cracker smasher.  Thanks for putting up with me all these years.  

But back to this post.  Never great at making friends.  I am bit more on the introverted would rather stay on my couch reading a book than going out and conquering the friendship world.  Which means that until I started a MOPS group I had no mommy friends.  Well that isn't true.  I guess all my high school friends had kids but they had them way back in the day and I was just starting out.  So it isn't like you can really commiserate as easily with them.

Then I started MOPS and met some awesomely lovely ladies.  And I made a mommy friend that I actually did stuff with outside of MOPS.  Well two in fact.  But one isn't technically a mommy friend since I met her before I ever got pregnant with Destructo.  Yay random Internet message board friends that live really close.  
Yeah back to my one mommy friend that I met once I had friends.  Hmmm maybe I need to draw you guys a time line for this or something since it is getting complicated.  But not tonight.  Tonight my bed is waiting.  Owl still had stomach food insensitivity for me to worry about and Destructo has pink eye.  But tomorrow it could happen.  

Okay for real back to my mommy friend.  You know you have become so firmly comfortable in your friendship when she is coming to your house tomorrow.  You know because you unknowingly exposed her kids to pink eye when you thought it was just allergies.  And she isn't mad.  Nope she is coming to your house tomorrow.  You messy house.  The house that you could be cleaning but nope it is just your mommy friend.  It doesn't matter.  You have seen her house in all it's messy glory.  No judging will go on.  

You do plan on picking up dog poop from the back yard before she gets here.  You also might even get bread for the kids PBand J's.  But if you don't manage that, eh you will pawn your kids off on her when she gets here to run to the store and grab a loaf.  She won't mind.  Well as long as you show back up with a Coke for her.  Although on a brain frazzled day she might not put two and two together and know what a Coke is.  

You give her tomatoes from your garden, she gives you eggs from her chickens.  Clothes are passed down from one kid to another.  And the kids play and beat each other up (okay well maybe the beatings are a bit one sided ::glares at Destructo::) and you guys are okay with that.  You sit and gossip and whine and always plan that girls night.  Always planning.  Probably will never happen because life is busy and kids are needy and times slips away.  
Goat wrangling is more fun with your buddies

And in that moment you realize that this mommy friend is part of your village. Along with your sisters (whom you also exposed to pink eye.  Your mom (yep exposed her too.)  Geez my kid is typhoid Mary.   (Check out this blog post that I stumbled upon last night that really struck a chord.  It is beautifully written and something most moms can totally relate to.)  It used to take a village to raise a child.  Now we are raising children sometimes single handedly.  It is good to have a make shift village to help.

I am so thankful for my mommy friends in real life and online.  Raising a kid is hard work.  Exhausting work even.  And you feel so worn out at the end of the day that you sit and don't go to bed because you are that tired.  It is too much work to move from the couch to your bed.  And you sometimes (more often than you want to admit) skip showers at night because yeah tired so tired.  But walking this long road with your friends lightens the load and makes it much more enjoyable.  

I hope all my lovely readers have mommy friends like mine.  It is nice to have a friendship void of having to clean your house to invite them over.  Yay friends!

Oh and I promise I haven't been drinking.  It was a bad night but the Razberita's were all the way in the fridge and again lazy.  Tired.  I just have a lot of rambling to do tonight obviously.  

1 comment:

  1. Note to self--start MOPS group immediately. J/k, I've found getting active online really helps, especially if you're new in town. I'm glad you've found that mom friend you really click with... I'm still searching since I moved almost four years ago...

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