Advice to Captain Destructo from Dinosaur Superhero

Hey, Dinosaur here from Dinosaur Superhero Mommy giving advice to Captain Destructo. My mommy posts about cleaning, cooking and organizing, and renewing her faith while taking care of a crazy Dinosaur...ME! I love my mommy but need to keep her on her toes and that's what I am going to help Destructo with today. If you have any advice to add on, let us know.

1. Don't let mommy ever tell you that you can't have cake. You do what you have to in order to GET THAT CAKE. I once climbed on a chair to score my prize. The most important part is bringing the cake back to a safe place to eat and making a HUGE mess. Eating it in just your diaper and shirt is even better.

2. Have a good hiding place. As an only child, I can't blame my terror on anyone else. I can only blame a few things on Balboa. So a good hiding place where mommy can't find you is important. See I bet you can't find me at all. By the time mommy finds you, she is so happy that she doesn't care what damage you did.

3. Everyone once in a while you MUST rip your room apart. This is my bedroom in our old house. I threw EVERYTHING on the floor, it was so much fun. There is nothing like a good day's work of havoc. I think it's time to rip up my new bedroom now...*evil dinosaur laugh*

4. When mommy really wants to take a good picture, move around and get the dog to help you. Then keep trying to jump off the couch. Wait till mommy gives up and is almost crying, then that is when you sit still.

5. Be ready to attack anyone, anywhere. You must gain their trust and make them believe you are being a good boy, then go in for the kill. Sure you get yelled at, but we MUST keep them on their toys, it's our job as boys.

6. ALWAYS make a mess when eating. Sure mommy gives me wet rags to clean up, but making a mess is so much fun. It's even better when you make a mess and threaten to spread it all over mommy's  furniture.

7. Farts are funny and noisy. When you fart, stick your hand in your pants and ...either smell it, rub it on mommy, or get her to smell it. She will tell you that gentleman don't do that, but I say ROAAAAR. I'm a dinosaur NOT a gentleman, so smell my stinky fart mommy.

8. Rolling around like a crazy animal is vital to keeping up our destruction.

9. You must have a few cute faces that you rotate so you can get away with doing bad things. A cute face, smile and giggle can make a mommy's heart melt. She will automatically forget what you did, laugh, and hold you tight. It works even better if you dress up really silly.